When I mentioned that I had taken on my first design client, Megan, my mom quickly jumped in, “Well, you have to do my master bedroom!”
There are two things you might be thinking right now…
1.) Your mom is the reason your business is here and she has been with you every step of the way. This is an amazing opportunity for you to give back. Yay!
2.) Working with your mom on a design project? Iceberg. Dead ahead.
So, it may be crazy, but I’m going to walk the tightrope of working with my mom as a design client and we’ll hopefully end up with a beautiful room and still be on speaking terms when we’re through with the whole thing.
I’ll share “before” pictures soon, but here is what she wants…
- She loves the beach and wants a coastal, restful feel to the room, but doesn’t want it to look “themed” at all.
- She’s pretty traditional in her decorating style, so this room needs to flow with that style.
- You can see the master bedroom from the living room, so she wants the colors to coordinate.
- Built-ins around the bed for storage, display and to feature the bed.
- She doesn’t want chippy painted furniture. (Was I adopted?)
(I’m talking just about what my mom wants, because my dad’s opinion is pretty much irrelevant. Not really. He just doesn’t have strong opinions on things like fabric and bedding. He’s picky about things being comfortable and within reach, so we’ll work on that when it comes to the built-ins and accessories.)
When we originally started looking for bedding and fabric, my mom was steering me towards French blues, but I kept swaying more towards pale blue/greens. I think that color evokes more of the coastal, restful feel she wants.
Here’s the concept for the room…
This was the picture that sort of kicked off the overall idea for the bedroom…
source unknown
They don’t have a bed frame or headboard, so we want to use built-ins to make a feature out of bed, but also provide storage and display. My dad and I are going to build them together. My dad and I have both done enough building that we feel like we can tackle it. Jeff is busy working on his master’s degree, so we’re on our own unless we get in the weeds!
I initially suggested planking on the wall with-in the built-ins, but my mom didn’t like the idea, so I switched to a starched fabric wall. Thumbs up from mom on that one, since that was initially her “Army wife trick” that inspired me to starch the fabric to the wall behind my bed.
This is the fabric I chose to starch to the wall and also to use for a bedskirt and pillows. I was thinking possibly curtains as well, but she just got plantation shutters, so we might just leave the windows alone.
source Sailrite
I selected this fabric as an accent for a bolster pillow…
source Sailrite
I think it’s fabulous, but it’s a trust exercise for my mom. It’s just a pillow, so I think it’ll be okay.
For the bedding, we’d like to use a classic white quilt…
source Pine Cone Hill
…with a pale sky blue matlasse spread for the end of the bed…
source Pine Cone Hill
…and shams…
…and a flat weave wheat and cream rug to add some texture and a “sisal” look to the floor without feeling scratchy underfoot.
source Dash & Albert
I’d like to paint a pale blue/green on the walls. This is Harbour Haze by Benjamin Moore, but I don’t know if it’s what we’ll actually use. We’re going to get the bedding and fabric and then match the paint to those in person.
I’d like to paint a tall oak cabinet that’s in their room in MMS Milk Paint Marzipan, but that’s another thing my mom’s not sure about. She always pictured it in Bergere, but I don’t think that would work with this room, so we’re going to work on everything else and then we’ll debate the furniture!
I think this warm beige would fit the coastal color palette.
I’ll share more details as we get into the room makeover a bit further…
What do you think so far? Any tips on working with family members?
You can see the before pictures of the room in part 2.
63 Responses
I love it already! Such a soothing color palette. Would love to see the differences between your and your Mom’s choices, and what ultimately ends up in the room. It’s going to be gorgeous!
April, I love this idea!
I love it! I will be following this quite eagerly as this is the look I would love for my master bedroom. It’s going to be awesome!
This could be fun…or, not. Sounds as if you and your mother have worked well together in the past, and she has great taste, too. Maybe, just different from your taste in some ways. The fact that she wants Bergere for a furniture color tells me she likes the grayish-blue tones, which are also “coastal” colors (fog and stormy waters, anyone?). I think that either Bergere, Marzipan, or even Mora could work in the palette she wants. Of course, if you’re going with blue walls, you probably don’t want blue furniture… To me, stripes are nautical, have you thought of incorporating them into a pillow, rug, or bed covering? Accent pieces such as vases, mirror/picture frames or lamps that look like they are made from “sea” glass (“beach” glass?) might look good. I like all your choices, looking forward to seeing how it turns out!
Can’t wait to read and see more……and I can add you are a hoot ! LOVE your phrases “iceberg ahead”, “trust exercise” and especially “was I adopted?” !
XOX
Full steam ahead Marian !
Looking forward to the progress on this one – love what you have pulled together so far with your Mom’s final design in mind. I am really interested in seeing how the built-ins around the bed look!
When I redid my mom’s room 3 years ago, I waited until she was firmly planted at my uncle’s for 2 weeks…and I didn’t tell her. I gutted it…3 days just removing wallpaper, retextured the walls, ripped up carpet, gutted the small 1/2 bath, rebuilt the closets…paint, flooring, furniture, bedding…the whole thing! But I knew we would never agree and it would be a total frustration to do “with” her. SHE LOVED IT! Thank God. Unlike my daughter, whose room I made-over while she was at camp…her first words…”I hate it.” Always a risk! You are a saint for being able to “go with the flow”….I would be nuts!
I think you both will be fine! You’ve got a great feel going on there!
I redid my mom’s bedroom once as a gift to her, based on what she wanted. After we were done she repainted the color. LOL. It was fine but the color she painted wasn’t the color wave she had told me to go in! I still tease her about that!
Your mom’s bedroom is going to be gorgeous!
Ah man….I received my sailrite catalog a few weeks ago and that is the *exact* floral-ish fabric I had picked out for my bedroom. I was thinking curtains though….hopefully people won’t think I am copying. Ha ha 🙂 Excited about your mom’s room and looking forward to seeing the progress. Have fun with it!!!
Lol! No chippy furniture? I think you were adopted! 🙂
Also my favorite laugh out loud comment!
I love that you are nudging and suggesting but not pushing. We all have that perfect decor picture in our heads and making it come to life can be frustrating sometimes. It is going to be fabulous and both of you are going to love the feeling of accomplishment!!!
wow…what an honor to work with your mom!!! idea…paint the walls bergere in a wash (hand “painted” on with a rag in huge “uncontrolled strokes” ) and paint the furniture/built ins around the bed marzipan. love the fabrics…love the colour ways…love that its your moms room! enjoy this precious time!
I am really enjoying the stories you are telling – the historical ones about your business, and the visual ones about other people’s spaces being transformed. I get s little excited when I see there is a new post. 🙂
I am painting my kitchen cabinets right now. I need all the visual encouragement I can get right now to push through this job.
And no, I’m not a robot.
I just read my husband your comment about your Dads opinion being irrelevant. He laughed and said Amen! Truthfully, most men don’t care about being involved in fabric choices, décor, etc as long as its comfortable, functional and within budget.
I do love the fabric and color choices that were selected. My first thought when you wrote you where designing a Coastal bedroom for your Mom was I hope she does a accent wall with planking. My Mom just did this in her dining area as she wanted a farmhouse look and it really looks awesome. However, since your Mom wants a more traditional look fabric is a great choice.
Good luck and I cant wait to see the full reveal. I understand what you are saying about designing a room with a certain style whether coastal, farmhouse, etc and not having it come off theme looking. However, you a “pro” at styling rooms so I know it will be beautiful!
I have a new house and did not want to have all those holes in the wall. If we could have just secured it to the bookcase I would have been game but I like the fabric idea. We will see. I’m excited. Marian’s Mom
Good for you for letting Marian work on your room! My mom always says she wants me to help her but she can’t let go of the reigns. 😉 I can’t wait to hear how you two meld your visions.
kim…wow. never knew your name….i have expressed several times how much ” i love your mom” ….it stands even MORE!!! ?
Love all of the ideas. You are a thoughtful listener so I don’t think you will have too much trouble.
Love it!
Love it! Especially the fabric for the bolster and the rug. Advice. Smile a lot and count to ten or twenty before responding too quickly. Is there room for a corner for her with a really comfy chair or chaise?
Marian,
I like where you are headed. I am going to e-mail you a pic of something that she might like to add a little coastal feel to the room. I hate that she didn’t like the planking idea…we are going to be planking some walls at our beach condo in December. I have decorated my sisters home a few times and it always comes out pretty good (thank goodness), but working with family can get tricky.
Blessings,
Linda
Love it~ I do hope you do some before pictures as well as the after pictures. Thanks. M.
I can understand your feelings. My friends who have tried helping their mom’s with organizing and decluttering stopped because it just wasn’t working with the resistance they were getting.I love the colors you chose. I live on the water and the painted wood is everywhere in my house so I prefer the look of your inspiration picture with the ship lap. The fabric colors are so pretty for the bedskirt but would be very busy on a wall for me. I’m going to love this adventure.
Oh my that is GORGEOUS! Can’t wait to see how it comes together so I can steal it for MY bedroom! Haha!
HI Marian! I wish I was your MOM!!!!! lucky her! 🙂
love the choices, they’re going to be BEAUTIFUL! looking forward to seeing them all put together, love the step by step too!
I think I may have found the location of the source picture. Love the room and your picks for recreating it! http://www.houzz.com/photos/693419/Hill-Country-Modern-rustic-bedroom-austin
LOVE the color choices! I would love the planked walls, but understand your mom’s aversion since its a new house. I’m going to incorporate some of your choices along with that photo when we get to re-do our bedroom. And my hubs feels the same way…just make things comfortable, within reach, and he’d find it perfect if he didn’t have to get involved in the planning, painting, moving furniture, etc…8~)
The harbour haze is nice, palladian blue is also nice in a coastal look also benjamin moore. I would put a beige (sand) color blanket under your white bedding so it showes when you fold the top back and maybe a clear glass lamp with a beige linen drum shade. Cant wait to see the results.
Your design looks gorgeous! Just one thing…. If she says she loves French blue and Bergere…. can that particular color be incorporated anywhere at all? Does she have an ensuite, where maybe the cabinet can become Bergere? That way it coordinates, but doesn’t directly clash since it’s not in the same room. Just thinkin’. If she *weren’t* your mom, but another client, and she said she wanted French blue and Bergere, would you listen to her and accept that color choice? Color is soooo important for me, especially those that surround me every day. But I’m sure ya’ll will work it out! Good luck and I can’t wait to see the results!
It’s a tricky thing, because I’m balancing what she says she wants vs. what she’s telling me she wants, if that makes sense. I think that this palette is much better for the feel she wants, based on the fabrics and bedding I was finding. The patterns I was finding in the french blue palette felt stronger and gave more contrast. I put two concepts together, but this is the one that was more serene, peaceful and even more elegant.
Yes, I think a part of my job as a designer is giving the client a space that is outside of their box, but will still work with things they love, if that makes sense!
Also, she has a throw and pillows in that pale blue/green in the family room and she loves them, so I’m giving her more of that.
I think you’re doing a good balancing act/job to give her what she will love.
Don’t worry everyone. I read this post and texted my mom right away. “Come on, don’t be a sissy. Do the planking.” Followed by, “Drywall is cheap.” Then I called her and convinced her to go with the planking.
PLANKS PLANKS PLANKS!
Family support at its best!
I think the planks will be nicer! Lots of other places to use the fabric…
ha!! leave it to your BRO to convince your MOM…(to your Mom and Dad, such enjoyable family dialogue heheh)did we KNOW you had a brother Marian/are there any MORE of you…lol..
I LAUGHED OUT LOUD soooo hard when I read what you wrote Marian, (no chippy paint? WAS I ADOPTED!?) LOLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL
comedic!
not the first time I’ve guffawed when reading your stuff ! ok, this is crazy have commented 3 times, lol. BYE
love the fabric choices
I have the same fabric in my bedroom!!
I love your choices! I have found that when I try to work with my mother, she questions nearly every move I make. However, when I make changes in her home while she isn’t home, she comes home and loves it. The problem is that she can’t see the vision like I can. She doesn’t “get” placement and color. Sometimes you just have to beg for their trust.
Marian’s dad here. I like the choices the girls are making. I like the idea behind “coastal” decor. But most important is where do I put my keys when they come out of my pocket, where is the dirty clothes hamper, how many step to the closet to get dressed in the morning and, FIRST PRIORITY where can I plug in my iPhone so it charges all night and sounds the alarm at the right time.
dear seed…..it is VERY very CLEAR why we ALL love what you do!!!! your family ROCKS!!!! t.y.
Beautiful! Are you sure you aren’t designing my bedroom?!
Love the family dialog here! Those fabrics are gorgeous!!!
Sometimes I see something I love, especially if it is a beautiful color and bring it home only to remember that I like living with pale colors in my home. More peaceful. Even though I still really like the peacock colored pillow, I take it back knowing that in the end I will be happier with the over all feel of the room without it. 🙂
Looking forward to more reveals!
I’ve been there!
Have to treat you mum like a client. I gave mum 3 options for everything. 1 was always a bit ‘out there’. It worked a treat. I set it up on a spread sheet with costs as my mother is visual – put it all (with pictures and material samples)on a giant pin board. Which I then put in the lounge so she could keep looking at it.
Well, it all looks wonderful, but i must say, i think this is going to be fun, i am probably your mom’s age. My son’s don’t like my style and when i was young i would not have cared for it either. Can’t wait to see what you decide together.
Your mom does not like the “chippy look,” yet you are going to use Marzipan? That doesn’t compute to me; why would a designer ignore the client’s wishes?
Milk paint doesn’t have to be chippy, does it?
No, it doesn’t. I just like it that way! 🙂
Because milk paint doesn’t always have to look chippy. I’ve done milk paint pieces for her before. 🙂
I like all of your choices. I am so interested in the starched fabric wall treatment. I live in a coastal community in Florida-I don’t know of anyone who has done that? I think the fabric colors are great but the print reminds me of a more traditional style. I do understand your Mom not wanting a “themed” coastal style. I would not like that either. I do less patterns in my home except for smaller projects, a pillow is about as much print as I can work with only because I like to change things out and it is easier to do in small doses. Artwork on the walls are my idea of prints in my home. I do like a print for a bed skirt because that is an easy switch when you are seeking a change. I do use cream and white quilts, too. That way my patterned sheets can be visible if I want to turn the bed down. This will be a great project! You always make a room look great with such unique ideas and items you place in the room!
This project will be interesting for both you and your mom. I think the advice to remember that she is your client first and your mom second is right on. You will both learn from each other and the experience will impact your relationship positively. That’s my prediction!
The coastal theme is especially interesting for me because I have been moving toward putting together my own bedroom based on that idea. I have white and off-white wicker furniture in the room and plan to paint the walls about the same color you are suggesting for your mom’s walls. I have been going for more of a “themed” look tho’, having chosen a comforter set with a seashell pattern and colors of blue that go with the wall color. I have white pleated shades at the windows and want to find a rug about 3×5 or so for the side of the bed. It is a small room and the furniture pretty much fills it–matching headboard, bedside table, small dresser and a tall chifferobe (sp.?). I had also thought of using planking on the wall behind the headboard. Don’t know if that will happen as I don’t have a handy husband or dad and I don’t use power tools. We’ll see. Anyway, I will be very interested and anxious to see this makeover unfold. And I think you and your mom and dad will have some fun doing it, too. Be prepared, though, for your mom to come up with other projects for you!
I love your choices, and I think you and your mom will do great together!! After all, she did ask for your guidance, so she trusts your judgment. Things will work out and if your client disagrees with things, it’s good that your mom is the first one so you can learn to handle those situations and work them out. Good luck!!
Hola Marian, me muero de curiosidad de ver como continúan. A medida que iba leyendo me hizo pensar en que sería lo mismo que trabajar para mi mamá…a veces los miembros de la familia son los clientes más difíciles de satisfacer! Sobre todo cuando es nuestra madre.Muy buenas tus elecciones.Finalmente seguro quedará fantástico!
Saludos.
As a designer myself, family projects can be tricky. Just remember that your mom didn’t have to ask you for help. She WANTS you help, which is of course already a sign of trust. Give her your best design options and let her choose what she loves. Good luck!
You’re a brave one to work with your mom! I know how difficult it can be, I work with mine sometimes, not on design, though.
Tell your mom that the French coastal girl I am loves soft blues rather than “French bluees”, maybe that’ll convince her to go for your color palette.
You are very brave. I would have backed out on her first line request! Have Fun.
This is going to be so much FUN to watch how it develops !!
Love all the ideas and the whole family weighing in! Just an fyi – at World Market I found Agate drawer pulls that I used on a vintage Ethan Allen dresser that had 2 different types of drawers, so needed 2 kinds of pulls. I painted it a foggy gray that reminded of a Maine sea. On the four lower drawers I used rope as pulls. It was so “beachy” without screaming beach. And it all started with the Agate pulls! However the design comes together, it’ll be gorg!
The softer pastel palette is soothing but there are definitelyy deeper blues that can incorporate an ocean/beach theme. If she seems disinterested or needs to “think about things” then you might out together a mood board with more saturated colors and see her reaction. It’s a very fine line working with family, because usually they don’t want to challenge our opinions out of their love and respect for us. Bowever, it’s easy for us to bulldoze them into thinking they want what WE want. From what you’ve posted, it unfortunately sounds like you pooh-pooped two of her color choices…French blue and Bergere. Before she spends any money, I’d surprise her by offering option #2 with her choices. Just my opinion.
I do some freelance decorating and worked with my mother on coverting a guest room into her office. It went great and she loves the final result. Very neutrals, new desk and chair, reupholstered seat on another chair. When working with clients though, it is surprising how many have strong opinions of what they would like, while others could care less. If you have the former, you have to be respectful of their desires while steering them in a good direction. I know you know most of this……good luck!! I can’t wait to see the final project.
I love the color pallet! I have a question. What is the benefit of starching fabric to the wall versus wallpaper?
Thanks and can’t wait to see the finished room!
I changed my mind. The hemp sheets hands down are my fav. I have a chair that is in dire need of a makeover!
Oops, wrong post ?
Oh my gosh…Moms! My Mom is my best friend, but will give me her honest opinion about my work in the snap of your fingers! No sugar coating……It’s funny you asked, right now I am working on a post about my Mother and a Mirror….just deciding on the one photo I am allowed to use of us, is a ‘long painful’ decision!! Have fun, looking forward to seeing you share this time with you Mom!
Ooooo I am excited for this one! I love the coastal beach styled rooms, this one sounds so relaxing. Its always hard working with your family because as much as you try to work professionally with your family its difficult because your on a comfort level already. I like the marzipan I think the cream white will change it up a bit from a stark white and it won’t be such a contrast on a blue/green/gray wall. It will still stand out but blend a little nicer.
This is such a nice way to give back to your parents 🙂 Can’t wait for more!
Lauren Baxter | Lovely Decor
xx