One question I’ve been asked on occasion through the years of sharing our home on the blog is, “What do the previous homeowners think of your changes?” With our PA house and then our MN house, I never heard from the previous owners. I never really expected to or even wanted to. I know that changing a home is a sensitive thing. For some people, they are happy to see a new owner make a house their own. For others, it’s painful and even insulting to see their home changed. I wasn’t very mindful of that when I first started sharing our PA home here on the blog almost 15 years ago (mostly because it was my mom and a handful of other people who read the posts!) But, I have since become aware of the fact that I am sharing a place that someone else called home and they just might read what I write. They picked out the paint colors on the walls and tended to the garden beds and I need to be respectful of their choices no matter how much they differ from my own. I can change things without opinionated and potentially hurtful commentary.
When we first set foot in our current home in Maryland, the work it needed was obvious. But, there was also an intangible quality you must feel to know. This house felt happy and loved. Not only that, but I felt I might’ve been friends with the woman who picked out the wallpaper, paint colors, and shrubs. Blues and greens were prominent throughout the house, the windows wore homemade curtains, and the yard had clearly been well-tended when the owners were younger and in better health. I felt like this home was a little gem just waiting to be polished up.
We learned this was a Better Homes & Gardens floorplan and was purchased with a 50-mile exclusivity radius. And, as we started renovation projects, we heard over and over again what a high-quality home this is. Even the plywood subfloors were top-notch, the wallpapers were high-end, and the original 50-year-old carpet padding was still in great condition and could’ve been used under a new carpet if we hadn’t switched to hardwood floors. It was a home worth investing in and one that was going to be fun to update and personalize, which is what we’ve been doing since we bought it in 2022.
A few months ago, I received Instagram messages from a few of the grandkids of the couple who built and lived in the home until they passed away. Apparently, one of them made the discovery that the home was being shared online and it circulated through the family. It made me happy to hear they were excited about the updates and changes we were making. It was also amazing to hear stories and memories about the house… Pancake breakfasts at the bar in the kitchen, their grandpa’s interest in geology and a fondness for the rock bed along the back of the house, summer afternoons with cousins playing in the pool, and races down the long hallway to the bedrooms.
A couple of weeks later, I received a beautiful letter from one of the daughters of the original owners and, as it happens, she now attends our church. I was able to meet her, give her a hug, and learn more about her parents and the house. She agreed that her mom, Dorothy, and I had a lot in common and that she would’ve liked the changes we were making. This was the second house Dorothy and her husband had built and they made some modifications, including removing a half bath in favor of storage (I had a gut feeling about that) and converting a “garden room” that would open to the pool into a fourth bedroom. But, her daughter shared a few things with me that Dorothy wished she had done differently…
make the kitchen window larger
Well, Dorothy, you can check that one off the list! I felt the same as you and it was a priority to make the window larger in the kitchen. I wish you could see all of the lovely light that comes into the room now.
Here is how the kitchen looked before…
…and now with the larger window…
And here is the change from the outside. The kitchen window is on the far right of the photos below…
installed paneled doors instead of hollow-core
I smiled when I heard of this one because I agreed from the first time I saw the doors. This house feels like it should have paneled doors, but the hollow-core doors do speak to the era the house was built and what was trending at that time. I would like to eventually change out all of the doors not only to add more architectural interest but also because many of the doors are sticking or the thin plywood veneer is pulling away from the frame or chipping in the corners. It’s a low priority, though, so I’m not sure when that will happen. I have seen some great inspiration for adding trim to hollow-core closet doors, so I am planning on doing that. Anyway, the doors are on my radar, Dorothy!
We have upgraded the hardware so far…
…and gave all of the doors a fresh coat of paint. We even added French doors to the studio…
more attention to sightlines
Now, this one made me laugh because it’s true. You look down this long hallway lined with doors and the focal point at the end is the toilet. Anytime I take pictures down the hall, I’ll pull the door closed just enough to shield the toilet from view. It’s one of those things you don’t really think about when you’re looking at a flat floor plan, though, so I can see how that was missed. We’re planning on renovating the bathrooms, but I don’t know if there is a way to reconfigure the space to solve that problem. It might just be an easy-to-find bathroom for guests. You just point down the hall and it’s pretty obvious where you need to go.
I loved hearing that there were things that Dorothy would’ve changed. This is the second house they had custom-built and they made changes to the original floorplan to suit their needs and wants and still ended up with things they would change. I actually wrote about that very thing in my book, . Even though custom homes are very custom, they are still rarely, if ever, perfect. A beautiful home isn’t about perfection or getting everything right. It’s about making it yours and making it a place that you love and that works for your family. And, it’s okay if the view at the end of the hall is a toilet.
37 Responses
My home is a BH&G floor plan as well. I love it. There aren’t many changes I would make to it. I found another on Instagram and I like what that owner did to it. It’s so interesting to see how similar designs can be personalized. 🙂
I went back to my childhood home after my parents died. The new owners invited me in and had so many questions. We were a family of ten. With one bathroom at the end of the hall. 🤣
I loved the house we owned before the one we’re in now, and often wonder what changes the new owners have made. Like you, I felt a deep respect for the home and the owner who loved it, and saw changes I made as more of a restoration than a renovation. We were only the second owner of that home, and are the second owner of our current house. I don’t feel the same hesitation in making changes to this house. Our former home was unique, and had the kind of woodwork and details often only found in a house of its vintage (early 1930s), while three of the 10 homes on our street were built from the same plan. The previous owners of our current home also had very, very different tastes, and there is very little that I would have chosen if I’d been in their shoes. I like this house, and have been working to make it my own, but I just don’t feel the same connection as I did with the other one.
Love the kitchen and the green cabinets. Kitchens just look better without upper cabinets but having that storage is nice too. We added a knee wall to shield the toilet view from our hall. Maybe there would be room for that.
I loved reading about Dorothy and this house—made me tear up a bit!
Me too Fran!!! I had to grab for a Kleenex!!! It was just so sweet to read about. I guess I am hoping someday someone will be thinking about my former homes and they way I cared for them.
On a side note, I moved out of my beloved older home in 1992. It had a front sitting room. I had made the vintage “look” curtains. On a recent trip back, the home is in another state, we drove by…..AND YES!!! the curtains were still there!!! Only now they ARE truly vintage!!! The home has sold 4 more times since we left….so that is pretty good! It made me smile.
Several years ago I had the opportunity to get a quick tour of my grandparents house. They built it about the time I was born and owned it for 40 years. The new owners had made changes, some I agreed with, other changes made me cringe. But it hasn’t affected my memories of G-ma and G-pa’s house, the new look can’t replace that.
When we bought our house (3rd generation, built by my husband’s grandfather), my mother-in-law said she was excited to see what I would do with it. She gave me the freedom to make it my home, and she always enjoyed seeing my projects.
Wow, my parents used a Better Homes and Gardens plan to build my childhood home. They had to make a few changes to save money that they later wished they hadn’t done, but overall they loved their home and took excellent care of it! Two of my siblings live there today. I’m glad to hear that you are in contact with some of the former house dwellers and that there aren’t any negative feelings there. I think that people need to realize that a lot of the time new owners are just not going to keep things the way YOU had them! And then, sometimes they do. All the houses I have lived in over the past 30 years STILL sport the very same curtains that I made for them when I lived in them all the years ago! Not even I would have kept them all this time if I still lived there!
I just love this story about this home bringing the two families together through the history of the house. If there is space enough, a short wall installed next to the toilet was very common back in the time this home was built. Helped hide the toilet from view. Your home is coming together so well and in a relatively short amount of time. I’ll be interested to see what you plans will be for those hollow core doors if you do that project.
It might sound silly but this was an emotional read for me. It brought back memories of my very first home and the changes we made. You always sound respectful of others in your responses to questions you are asked.
What a lovely addition to your renovation story. I have always felt you were so careful about the changes you made to your homes with regard to the former owners’ feelings. We have always put a lot of effort and thought plus sweat and money into the homes we have renovated. New owners always want to make the home “theirs” when they take ownership. I have trained myself not to take it personally when people rip out or paint over my designs. As I told my husband the last time he complained about the new owners “undoing” all we had done…”They gave us a lot of money …they can do what they want.” But I have to admit, I don’t really want to see what they have done because I liked it the way it was.
The first paragraph of this post, is one of the reasons I follow you. You interact with the world with compassion and love, and that makes the entire blog experience so enjoyable.
I couldn’t have said it better, and feel exactly the same way about Marian and her blog!
I love this story. Your home is coming together beautifully, and it would be hard for anyone to dislike your updates. I moved back into the house I grew up in after my Dad passed away. There had been few renovations or changes done since my Dad built the house in 1955. There were even less changes my father wanted to make. He would not have wanted me to waste my money; the windows were perfectly fine, along with the kitchen and bathroom. But I did update all those things and more. I also was able to follow through on adding a sliding glass door that my Mom and he had wanted to add but never got around to. I know in my heart they love every little thing I did to their house. And, we say that all the time.
I enjoyed your note. I inherited my parents’ retirement home that had had only cosmetic changes. Making my mom’s home into mine was difficult at times and very easy knowing my mom would love what I’d done. It has brick on the outside and occasionally I think of painting it but then I remember her & I watching a Curb Appeal HGTV show & her saying I’d like them to come and do landscaping but I’d hate it if they painted the brick. So I don’t.
You are an example of how a person should speak about a previously owned home. You saw the good (otherwise you wouldn’t have bought it), you imagined how you could make it work for your family, and you didn’t criticize the choices made by the previous owner.
Good for you, Marian! You are an example we all can follow – kind and nonjudgmental. Once again… Good for you!
The last line made me laugh! We have a lovely view of the toilet in the little powder room right off the LR although it is separated by a tiny hall. I try to remember to close the door, too, especially when company is coming! I painted a little sign that said POWDER ROOM so people know where to find it. Your home is shaping up to be so pretty!
I did the same thing: close the door to the Powder Room and put a sign on the door. No need to open the front door and be greeted with “that”!
Great article, M, as usual. It’s ok to show the toilet, given what they cost these days. When you renovate, I might suggest you install a Tushy for your old guests. Easy, Jeff could do it, or Calvin. Like fixing a carburetor on the chipper vac, just kidding. For that bath, however, I would suggest one other alteration, a higher counter. The first time I used the sink to shave I almost fell in. Just a suggestion, I know the boys would like that, particularly Marshall who is taller.
Looking forward to seeing you all in a couple of weeks.
I know you’re a Tushy fan! 😂 And yes, all of the bathroom counters are table-height right now, so we will definitely raise that height when we replace the vanity.
Love that you got to connect with the owner’s daughter, and she gave insight to what things her mom would have done different and how your styles are alike as well. I am glad you saw the quality construction of your home because they aren’t built like that today for sure. You mentioned before your late grandfather being a home builder and I am sure he would approve whole heartly to your buying this home and be so proud!
Well, you could do something unexpected and put a Dutch door in the bathroom ! But a pony wall sounds a lot more practical. Loved the article. The previous owners of my house live across the street, so I feel a little self conscious when I change much ( but I still do ). But the things they did I really like I give all the credit to them when I’m showing guests around.
Stunning hall lights! Where did you source them, please?
Sorry, here’s the post about them…
https://missmustardseed.com/new-lights-for-the-hallway-1970-home-renovation/
I so appreciate how thoughtful you always are about the things you’re changing. I’ve kept in touch with the people who bought our first two homes and I’m also in touch with the people who built and lived in our current home. We’ve changed quite a lot, but not because there was anything wrong with the original house. We’re a work-from-home empty nest couple and they were a young family with small children, so we’re working with different needs. But I love seeing the people who bought our homes make them into the perfect house for them! Thank you for setting a great example.
What a beautiful tribute to Dorothy! Our previous home was a holding barn for dairy cattle back in the 30s, turned into a 4 bedroom home in 1959. We bought it in 1999 and did quite a bit of remodeling over 20 years. In our small town everyone still called it ‘Monk’s house’. Monk was the son of the original land owner back in the early part of the 20th century. Its wonderful to know the history of your home!
I’ve said it before…”I love your kind heart”! It’s so awesome that you have connected with the former owner’s family and learned more about the history of the house. I read several blogs and you are my favorite because not only do I love your “style” but I appreciate your “heart”.
50 mile exclusivity radius? Does that mean no home looks like yours for 50 miles around you? I’ve never heard of this.
I agree with the others. You are always so gracious in your comments and updates. So refreshing these days.
And your FIL sounds too funny. ‘Almost fell in ‘ the sink. That really did make me laugh.
Yeah, he’s a character and probably my most dedicated blog reader. 😉 And yes, they bought the plans with a 50-mile exclusivity radius so no one within those 50 miles could build this house. I never knew that was a thing, either! Apparently, they did that because the first house they built ended up with a twin practically next door and they wanted to prevent that from happening.
I was also wondering about the 50 mile exclusivity radius–thanks for the explanation.
I’d love to meet your FIL. He sounds like a hoot.
I want to echo what others have said–I appreciate how you have approached documenting the changes to your home in a thoughtful manner. I always cringe when I see bloggers making unnecessary rude remarks about the previous owner’s choices. You don’t know what challenges the previous owners encountered–maybe they didn’t have the money, or the time, or the health, to make updates. Priorities shift with time. What matters far more are the happy memories created in a home.
We have a situation with a bathroom in a small hallway right next to the dining room! One solution I’ve found helpful is to put a hinge pin door closer (Amazon has them) on the door. It gently swings the door almost closed. It can also be adjusted to completely close the door.
I might also hang a curtain in the hallway some day.
I love this! We bought similar homes and as you go through each remodel, I am anxious to see what unfolds. Hope to begin a few changes in mine this winter.
Thanks for the inspiration!
Oh I just love this post. It is so kindly and thoughtfully written. You are really a kind soul, Marian. I LOVE you were able to meet a gal who knew that house so well. And she goes to your church! How neat is THAT?!!?
May Dorothy and her hubs rest in peace, knowing that the kharma joy of their home is now felt and enjoyed by a wonderful new family who CARES. God bless!
Marian,
I too have to agree with all the other commenters. You have always been VERY respectful of the former owners.
Very cool she goes to your church too!!!
Good read today…..as usual .
We sold in CA and bought in IN in 2021. I LOVED our house in CA, but always had some updates in mind if we had stayed. I did not think I would actually find a house in IN that I loved as much. Surprise. I did. We did some updates out here, all cosmetic. Painted all the walls, redid ALL the flooring, and then this year, (finally) cosmetically updated the kitchen. Like you, I wanted a house that felt lived in and loved. We are the only 3rd owner of this 47 year old ranch on an acre of property. The previous owner has stopped by on occasion to pick up mail or a package delivery. I did show her the house, but she did not really say much. (The house went on the market due to their divorce.) When we redid the kitchen, I again invited her to come over to see it. Part of me was afraid it was painful for her to see the changes we made, but she recently texted that she’s looking forward to seeing the kitchen in a few weeks. (Like you, Marian, our paths have crossed outside of the house. She is a technician at the medical center that I go to, so I have seen her there too!) Our old house in San Diego? Friends and family report back to me that they outside looks well kept, and they even decorated for Fall. That’s all I could ask for. This was an enjoyable post (I teared up too!), and I have really enjoyed the comments.
My husband and inherited the family beach cabin where I spent my summers growing up. Eventually, we had to make a choice to sell our large custom home on 5 acres with tons of yard work and maintenance or sell the beach cabin that had been in the family for over 100 years. As empty nesters, the large home sadly had to go. My husband, a master carpenter, built the house and customized every nook and cranny for our family over 20 years. Our kids had grown up in that home and so many memories were made there. I grieved selling for 6 years, often closing my eyes and imagining I was there in the middle of the woods in that wonderful peaceful house. The new owner embraced the house and invited us by a couple times, but truthfully it was too painful to go see it. He invited us again last summer and we accepted. He has made many changes, but he appreciates every detail my husband hand crafted, every shrub and tree we planted. It gave me closure and I no longer have to pine for my old house but can now think of him continuing what we started, loving the house and the land and putting his efforts into improving it. Your story definitely struck a nerve with me. I love the changes you are making to your house.
My grandfather built their house…and my dad and uncle helped (my dad was around 11/12 when the house was done, and my uncle is two yrs younger…so it was completed around 1960). It was well loved over the years! After grandma sold it (to a sweet young couple with a little one), she heard they were ripping up all her carpeting (all VERY COLORFUL!) to use the hardwood floors underneath the carpets. She was horrified. I was giddy that hardwood floors lie underneath! I told her I would’ve done the same, and that seemed to settle her down! 😂😂
About two yrs ago those second owners listed the house for sale. A cousin posted the mls link in a cousin chat group, and we all reminisced. It flipped us out a bit that the room grandma always had twin beds in…had a double bed in it. And the bedroom that always had a double bed…had twin beds! 😂😂
It was fun to see the beauty of that house, so many years later! We have so many many memories there. ❤️