“How’s Jeff’s job search going?”
“Have you figured out where you’re going to move?”
“Have you bought a house, yet?”
These are the questions I’m asked almost every time I see someone, speak to someone or text with someone. I don’t mind it at all. I would ask the same thing if I had a friend who was moving. But, the answer has stayed the same.
“We don’t know, yet.”
When I can see the expression on the inquisitive person’s face, I usually see something that resembles a cringe in one form or another. It might be eyebrows raised or a sympathetic look of surprise. And I don’t mind those reactions, either. I get it and there are moments when I catch myself cringing. I joke with Jeff by saying in my best Mrs. Bennet impression, waving an imaginary hanky, “Oh, whatever will become of us?!”
When one woman asked the usual line of questions and I gave the usual answer, I didn’t get the usual response. Her face lit up and she said something along the lines of, “Oh, well, that’s very exciting! There are so many possibilities!” And she is exactly right.
Uncertainty isn’t very comfortable, I admit. Uncertainty around questions like where will we live, where will Jeff’s next job be, and where will the boys enroll for school in the fall might make me feel a little squirmy and unsettled at times, but the situation is of our own making and it doesn’t have to be scary. And we didn’t make this decision without prayer and purpose. As Jeff put it the other day, we have a set direction, we just don’t know the exact destination. Yet. That means the future is filled with possibility.
It always is, I suppose, but there are times when we are much more aware of all of the roads that can be traveled and this is certainly one of those times for us.
If we really wanted to, we could buy an RV and travel around the country, homeschooling the boys and visiting places we’ve always wanted to see. We could sell the rest of our stuff and move to Europe. (Both of those options would sort of defeat the entire purpose of moving to be closer to our family!) We could also just buy a fixer-upper and work on it together, sharing our progress online.
Even though we’ve talked or dreamed about all of those options at different seasons of life, we don’t really want to do any of those things in this season and, more importantly, Jeff still feels called to work in full-time ministry as a pastor. But knowing that we could do a variety of things makes the uncertainty much more interesting, adventurous, and exciting. Jeff and I have had many long conversations about all of the potential options and we know, at any time, we could make a decision to go to one destination or another.
But we are choosing to wait. We feel like waiting is the right thing in this season and the right place will present itself in God’s good and perfect time. And until then, we will make the best of the season of waiting so it doesn’t just feel like sitting in a holding pen.
We are staying in a little Airbnb in Rochester through the end of June while Jeff finishes work and we tie up loose ends. We’re then going to visit family that we haven’t seen much of since our move to Minnesota (and visit our animals who are staying with our parents while we’re in transition). We’re going to hit the pool and take the boys on some fun day trips. We’re going to go places for me to paint. We’ve been invited to stay at two different lake houses, so we’ll definitely get that lined up! We’re even talking about a trip to New Hampshire or Maine just to see some beautiful things and enjoy being together as a family. Even a time of waiting, living out of suitcases and laundry baskets, and hopping from one place to the next can be sweet if you allow it to be.
(This is our family giving our Minnesota house a send-off the day before closing.)
Yes, we want to know where we’re going now. I know that, as a homebody, it’s going to be hard for me to not have a home to nest in for a while. We are eager to have a closing date on a new house and get the boys enrolled in their new school. We want an address, so figuring out where to forward mail isn’t such a headache. We are ready for all of that, but we don’t want to go just any place. We want to go to the right place. And the right place is worth a little patience, investigation, uncertainty, and waiting.
58 Responses
What a wonderful adventure you are living! Most of us have dreamed, at one time or another, of pulling up stakes
and heading somewhere new but you are lucky enough ( and brave enough) to actually do it. I know where ever you end up it will be the perfect place for you and your family. As you said, ” in God’s perfect time”.
The only one y’all are accountable to is God and since you have turned over this next chapter of your lives to Him already….go have fun until you get a direction from Him!
What a beautiful next chapter in life . I wish you all the best of luck and hoping by summers end you will have found your new place to call home.
All will feel right, when it is.
Kim
We prayed for God’s guidance last Spring. We sold two houses and bought one. Thru all the uncertainty and stress, we felt God’s presence all the way.
The house we live in now, the location, is like a dream. I cannot believe at this time of our lives and lots and lots of houses, He saved the best for last.
I am in awe of your faithfulness. I pray, when the time is right, all will fall into place for you.
As a frequent mover I empathize with all of your emotions and feelings. One of the best is right after everything is packed and out of your control and suddenly life is so simple. Everything you own is in a box or on a van and now its just you and your family. That uncluttered feeling is wonderful. It only lasts until you settle into a new place so embrace it, enjoy it and love a simpler life just for the time being. The adventures ahead will be amazing!
I too am a homebody and recently moved to New Hampshire! Please come and visit this gorgeous state- there are venues to paint, mountains to hike, streams for the boys to jump into. I would love if you all loved it enough to consider making it home!
My good friend and her husband sold 90% of their stuff, stored the rest, sold their house and in 2015 headed for Barcelona on a ship. They used Trusted Housesitters for most of their (free lodging) and spent 6 mo in Europe. Basically they went back and forth from USA to Europe for 5 years. Only Covid altered their plans a year early. So yes, you can enjoy this time of being fluid and getting the most out of it. You’ll make memories you and the boys will have forever. I’d love to be in your shoes. Or shoe as it were?.
My family went through this season of waiting as well but for financial reasons. Our motto was “Prayer and wine. Not always on that order. Makes for interesting prayer.” 😉 Sometimes you need quirky humor to get through it. Gods’ timing. Not ours. You’ll get there eventually.
The possibilities for your next chapter are endless! I’m sure a bit scary, but you’ve done scarier things in life I’m sure.
Can I quickly share our story? At 63, we sold our house, cars and 90% of our furniture & belongings and sold my small business in a short six weeks from making the decision to change our lives. We packed two suitcases each and boarded a plane to Europe…stayed in Airbnb’s for almost a year moving every month or so to a new region. It was soul enriching, relationship building, art and architecture filled and food discovering! After the year, we came home to Canada, had a house built and have now settled in to our final chapter enriched with experiences we would never have had if we didn’t take that leap of faith.
The path will unfold the way it is meant to be, I’m sure. ❤️
A positive attitude and outlook is EVERYTHING!!
Good for you and Jeff AND the boys.
My mom used to say ‘there’s a lid for every pot’!!! And how true this is.
God always has a plan. Your trust in His plan is evident.
Enjoy the journey.
I think you have taught me, at least, that it’s ok to be unsettled for awhile and explore the path you have decided to take. I like all the positive parts of your blog post. I don’t think it is a negative not to know exactly where you will land. Because being patient for the right home and place seems like it will pay off. I hope I will remember this when we downsize in 4-5 years!
I go with the exciting adventure, lots of possibilities concept. Maybe buy a fixer upper on a couple of acres, with a small barn and Jeff could start his own congregation and you could blog the fixer-upper side. Your situation would have really appealed to me when I was a young person. Now I’m just an old fuddy-duddy living voyeuristically through your adventures. Keep us informed.
In God’s perfect timing! But you MUST go to Maine! (Being a New England gal, it’s the best!)
I don’t any advice except please keep posting and keeping us updated. Prayers for safe adventures and blessings for Marian and family!
One of the favorite times in my life was when I learned, “You don’t have to do things the same you’ve always done them.” It opened my eyes to new possibilities, a different method of living life and sweet discoveries. I highly recommend telling yourself this occasionally. Like now, Blessings go with you and they’ll be waiting when you get there! Hugs from Texas….
I for one cannot wait to see what beauty catches your eye on your new adventure. I hope that you share it with us. Your creativity has overflowed your home into the unknown. And isn’t that exactly what God calls us to do? The parable of the talents is a perfect example. Invest what He has given us, extravagantly, so that He can increase it. Be a light and look for Him everywhere that you go and you will find more than you ever imagined. Blessings to you and your family!
Such words of wisdom, Miss Marian! I applaud your courage and willingness to let God direct you…that’s really what it’s all about. Many blessings to your family during this special time!
Great adventure! God will open the right door at the right time! Enjoy the journey.
Being a military family, I totally understand and have heard that same thing many times when my husband retired. All I can say is everything works out the way it should in God’s time!
And we did the rv/homeschool thing for a few months and its was AWESOME!
In 1988 my husband graduated from law school at 46 years old. Our children were 7 and 10. We sold everything we owned and sent the very few possessions we needed by UPS to a storage unit in WA state. We flew west with the 2 kids and a cat. It took 8 years to find a house we loved so there were several rentals during that time. We stayed in the house we found for 23 years, until my husband retired from his law practice. It took a lot of faith and a bit of courage to make such a move but we never regretted it. Those 2 kids are resilient and adaptable now as adults, far more than the youngest who was born after we moved and has really only known 2 houses. Life is an adventure-enjoy yours. God will provide.
Yes on moving creating resilient and adaptable adults! My oldest two were impacted in SUCH a positive way by our multiple moves when they were younger. As adults they are MUCH more adaptable than our younger children who have lived in one place.
It is exciting and God has a plan for each of us. Who knows what new doors he will open for you and your family but I know it will all be wonderful. Enjoy this sweet time together. Blessings
I’m so enjoying your posts and photos which keep us updated on your moving journey. I love and appreciate your taking us along on your adventure. I’m sure it will all fall into place as you trust in God’s plan and guidance for your family. It truly is an adventure!
WHAT A MARVELOUS ADVENTURE!!! Thank you for taking us on the ride♥️.
Hi Marian
You are the first blog I ever followed….I have learned from your wisdom and reflections your books and decorating genius…when I first followed you I made the yarn snowballs similar to yours…your compliment when I sent you a pic made me giddy ! From a distance God is watching you and your dear family and leading you to the right place…and it will be wonderful ! Come to Hingham? Massachusetts ! If only for a visit? We moved here for LOVE- grandchildren ! It was difficult to leave our home of 42 years but we knew the best was yet to come…and it surely will be for you and yours too!?
all the best to you ! Anne
Anne, Hingham! We used to pass through your lovely town on our way to Scituate. Spent all my summers with my precious grandparents in their cottage on the water. It’s been many years ago.
What adventures you will have to share of all the many ways God provided in ways you never could have imagined. He writes the best stories. What a blessing your example of stepping out into unknown to you, yet fully known by Him, is to everyone around you! Thank you!
I love the photo of your handsome family! Adventure awaits and you all are ready for it. Best of luck and much happiness in your new home…wherever it may be.
You have a great attitude, Marian, and that makes it a wonderful adventure. I’m sure you’re all growing closer as a family and stronger in faith and that’s a wonderful result. I’ve loved following your adventure (and I can’t help but hope that whoever bought your house might be a blogger so we can see what a wonderful “next life” that beautiful home has. But of course, home is where you all are together and I can’t wait for the next chapter in that adventure too.
Looking forward to having you with us for awhile as your path is revealed to you. The girls (Esme and Violet, or simply Es and Vi to us) have settled in to a predictable routine. They are very much at home now. I know they are looking forward to seeing their family again, but the grands are having a great time with them.
This is definitely my most favorite post. Just a great post. You can all be vagabonds for a while. We will all wait breathlessly for your final decision.
So excited for you and your family. God’s time is Always the perfect time. Enjoy this little adventure. You will settle in some place soon enough.
What do they say about best laid plans…. ?
I love your families trust in God to show you to the perfect life. Not everyone can do that. It use to be so hard for me, but truly horrible circumstances taught me how trusting in God can bring you out of darkness and into a perfect life filled with light. Now is my time and it is your time. God bless you and keep you safe. ?
You and your family are in a unique situation that most of us are either too scared to try or too poor to fulfil that kind of freedom! ha! I actually envy you! I have learned through the years that most things work out the way they should and it sounds like it will for you too. I’m looking forward to these unique situation posts you are going to be posting in the future about temporary lake house stays, random vacations, and awesome situations you will all find yourselves in as you navigate to your eventual nest. 🙂
You may already be doing something along these lines, but my husband (and Exec Pastor) has used Vanderbloemen (church staffing service) many times, from both sides, and they have been very helpful. Might be worth a look. After more than one season of waiting, the most recent being 2 years long (2018-19), I can relate. The waiting can be so hard, but the possibilities are endless and exciting. Blessings on your next adventure!
Uncertain transition is an uncomfortable place to be (I’ve been there!) but it also is reassuring and peaceful to now when you trust that Jesus has it all worked out, the ride is a lot more fun and adventurous! Enjoy the transition. We are excited right along with you, for the next home you will nest in! Somewhere along the way, I missed that your boys, grew up! I can see why you want to be closer to your parents. That is time that just can’t be gotten again. Have a wonderful summer!
As you know, God is with you. I pray the path is more easily seen the closer you get to “home”.
What a beautiful and handsome family you have. I wish you all a wonderful adventure!
Thank you for sharing your experience and faith – patient is worth being in the right place at the right time for your beautiful family! The transition time sounds like a wonderful luxury to be enjoyed!
I’m sure you will have a wonderful testimony of God’s goodness and perfect timing at the end of this! Meanwhile, I hope you all enjoy and have the best family times this summer. God’s got you!
I love the picture of your family! Everyone looks content and so happy.
Your feet will land right where they should.
Best of everything to each of you.
Be well, Cynthia
Oh please visit the beautiful state of Maine. I spent all my summers growing at our family home on Drakes Island and have gone back almost every year since. The Rugged rocky coast is breath taking much more so than New Jersey where I live now plus very few people. Try to get a dinner reservation at the Lost Kitchen Good Luck there. Maine is having its moment now and I am very happy for the Down East state. Have Fun with your family and explore ! We all cannot wait to see where you land !
I think it’s a wonderful adventure! And I’m guessing the boys think so too and that makes it all right. Have a FUN summer! You won’t get this time back!
I love that your family is enjoying this new adventure together. Most people just settle in to what feels comfortable without really being happy with it. They end up just going through life, not living it. It’s going to be so much fun to explore new possibilities while finding the next “right” place to be.
Because it seems as if your mind is so in agreement with you and your family and what you are doing, your next move will be made known to you soon.
Enjoy all that comes to you in the next couple of months.
So thankful that you are a good example of following God’s call and yet waiting on His timing. He is faithful. Blessings on your family as you enjoy your summer.
What denomination or type of church is your husband looking for? Where on the east coast would you like to be?
We are non-denominational, but he currently works at an Evangelical Free Church and has previously worked at an American Baptist and a non-denominational Bible Church. We’re looking to be in Virginia, Northern North Carolina, and possibly parts of Maryland. Ideally, we want to be in the middle of Raleigh, NC and Gettysburg, PA so we can be a nice drive to both of our parents.
When nothing is certain anything is possible. Priscilla Shirer speaks of burning bush experiences, that sets the trajectory of your life. Many people in a period of transition at the moment. I know Nate Johnston and Daily prophetic speaks a lot of life giving words into this if you want to go have a look. Excited for you!
OH la la ! Comme je trouverais cela angoissant ! Je vous admire de pourvoir vivre cela avec sérénité.
J’ai déménagé 20 fois en 50 ans, mais chaque fois avec un objectif précis et déjà je trouvais cela difficile, je n’ai pas un caractère aventureux….
Vous aviez décoré votre maison avec tant d’attentions, ce doit être difficile de la quitter ?
Néanmoins, je vous souhaite le meilleur pour cette nouvelle aventure.
I recently made a major move – leaving my New England home of 70+ years and moving to western NY to be closer to my son and DIL and their new babies. Everything is different and just when I was feeling sorry for myself, the twins decided to make their appearance a month early. That got me out of my own head. I sat in church Sunday and realized that, while everything is different and I still need to find the comfort places that will make this area feel like home, this was the right time to move. Seventy years have shown me that God always puts us where we need to be, not necessarily where we thought we should be…be where we belong. His blessings on you and your family as He moves you to the right place.
Oooooh! Come to Maine!!! We’d love to be blessed with your presence, even if it’s just for a few days of vacation. Plenty of amazing places for you to paint, the boys to frolic in the ocean and Jeff to relax and ponder. Or you all could hike the trails in Acadia National Park-stunningly beautiful…
Godspeed.
You know what they say……good things come to those who wait! And waiting in the Lord is the best waiting of all.
Exciting to see where the Lord plants your family. I’m reminded that it is God who determines the times and places man shall live. When my husband and I were in a waiting period as to where we would live and what his next job would be I took comfort in the scripture that said “It is good if one waits patiently on the salvation of the Lord”. How good it is to be His child and know that He directs our steps. May God richly bless you and your family as you wait on Him!
I am enthralled over your adventure. Who really wants a life of predictablity!! Growing up, my family never lived anywhere longer than two years and I cherish those wonderful adventures. God already knows where you are going so just reach out in faith and grasp His hand. You have my prayers for patience, contentment and joy in the waiting.
Isn’t it fun that each person/family has their own unique life? Many people seem to want everyone to be on the same path. But it is the unique that brings joy and adventure. It makes everyone’s lives better. Especially those on the journey!
While I know its anxious not having roots and place to really call home, enjoy this time and summer being adventurous, nomadic and a little spontaneous. I would definitely do the Maine/New England trip. My friend’s daughter and family have been living in Seville, Spain for six months because they wanted their children to experience living in a different culture and country. They will be returning to the US this summer but have loved Spain.
What a beautiful and handsome family you have. I wish you all a wonderful adventure! thanks for sharing this article.