Jeff and I have been talking a lot lately about what “makes us tick” or, more eloquently put, what makes our heart feel alive.
I think society encourages us from an early age to be sensible and doing the things that make your heart feel alive don’t always sound sensible. Get on the honor roll. Your SAT score will dictate how successful you’ll be in life. Go to college. Get a job with a retirement plan. Settle down and fall in line. I wonder how many people are living a “plan B life” because they were told to be sensible?
Now, I’m not talking about throwing caution to the wind, shirking responsibility or just doing whatever you want at all cost, no matter who it hurts. I’m not talking about selfishly pursuing whatever makes you happy. I’m also not talking about what moves you emotionally or the depth of love you feel for your family.
I’m talking about doing things that stir excitement and adventure within your soul. Things that make you want to spread your arms and breathe in deeply. You can’t believe that this is your life and you’re getting to live it.
For some, it might be travel, experiencing nature, or pushing their physical limitations.
For me, it’s finding, saving and living with things that are old. It’s more than a hobby and more than a business. It’s more than just the way I decorate my home. When I am in an old home or pouring over old things, there’s that stir. It makes me feel a part of something bigger. I can’t fully explain why wide planked floors, worn woods, wavy glass, hand-carved dovetail joints, crazed ironstone and frayed quilts evoke such a strong feeling within me, but they do.
In past years, as Jeff and I have discussed what we want our next home to be, I have really pushed towards buying an old home. Jeff didn’t get it. He understood I liked old things and the home was an important thing to me, but he didn’t really get it.
“Why can’t we just build a new home that looks like an old one?”
He would point out perfectly valid impracticalities and challenges of owning a 100+ year old home. And that stir in my heart that would feel squashed under the weight of sensibility. Now, in fairness to Jeff, he didn’t realize the weight his practical arguments had on my hopeful heart and I have to confess to being a dream-squasher at times, too.
This past weekend, he took me to dinner at a restaurant in an 1800’s home. I sighed over the floors and exclaimed that he has to take note of the door on the way back to the bathrooms. Our conversation naturally meandered to talking about old homes and, of course, I took it in the direction of living in one some day.
I don’t just love the idea of living in an old home. That would be thrilling, but what I love more than that is saving an old home. Buying one that has been neglected or the victim of some poorly done 1970’s renovation and make it beautiful again.
Something in that conversation made Jeff get it. I could see the lightbulb behind his eyes.
“Saving old things makes your heart feel alive.”
I had never thought of it in those terms, but yes, it does.
So, I was trying to think of how to end this post. Write about our dreams and plans? Examine why these things make my heart feel alive? I sat here…the letter keys still on the keyboard with my fingers just resting on top. Maybe this isn’t the kind of post that has a neat bow at the end. Maybe this is the kind of post that just “puts it out there” and leaves it to rest on the mind of the reader.
Maybe it makes you wonder and then discover what makes your own heart feel alive…
I absolutely LOVE this post! I’m so glad Jeff gets it now. My husband and I would love an old home but where we live, even the neglected ones are outrageously priced!
I get the same feeling with certain pieces I find. My heart feels alive. The feeling of knowing the many meals, conversations, tears, happiness, heartaches and every other memory my 100 year old homestead table has makes me smile. I find myself staring at it, thinking of all the times it’s been used. I get it Marian 🙂 Old pieces, dogs, and my son are what make my heart feel alive ❤
I’m glad he gets it! My husband and I built a new home, but like you, we are lovers of old homes – we just didn’t realize how much until we built a new home. We have since sold the new build and now live in an old fixer upper that we are slowly bringing back to life. There is something to be said about what makes your heart feel alive!
I think we feel alive when connections or ties are made. Isn’t that how people bind or click together in human relationships?. I think with old homes, one gets that sense of making a strong connection to the past, like we are sharing something unique with those before us. With a new home one doesn’t get that; you are starting from scratch and all the sharing is yet to come.
You hit the nail on the head!
I am so glad you wrote this, and my husband and I have also been discussing the same thing the last few years. Though we’ve never described it as what makes “our hearts feel alive” but I like thinking of it that way. I too am very connected to old things. It is my hobby, but it’s more than that. It’s something I feel very connected to and I would like someday to own a fixer upper. My husband never quite got it either until that show of the same name. We have watched it together many times now and not only does he love the show (who doesn’t?) but I think he finally gets it. Now we talk about how we will someday have our own “fixer upper”. I feel invigorated just watching the show, and I’m not even the one doing the fixing!
Sheila
http://www.maisondecinq.blogspot.com
What you just put into words and shared with us…is exactly how I feel. There is an overwhelming sense of joy when we are in our happy place, isn’t there?
My happy place, much like your’s is surrounded by my favorite things in life. Old and worn wood, rusty metal, vintage linens, antique kitchen tools and cutting boards, demijohns and hand blown glass bottles, tattered leather bound books, enamel pitchers, ironstone, topiaries and live plants, cotton branches and fresh flowers, willow baskets, vintage flatware and pretty plates, beautiful paintings and amazing furniture finds to refinish and the list goes on and on.
What your husband said, is spot on. There is something so special about giving an old piece another chance at life. They have stories to tell and much more special because of it. I was at my favorite shop today and it just hit me…how lucky I am. My mother (who passed 2 years ago) had such a passion for all things antique and vintage and I developed an appreciation quite young. It makes me feel so close to her, as I hunt for things that catch my eye, with my girls in tow and as I see them admire an old doll or this or that, they pick out one special piece they would like to have whenever we go. And I feel so lucky to share that with them.
It is so much more than a hobby. Well worded post, I completely relate to every word! Much love from Skaneateles, New York!
Oh boy…you hit a nerve with this one…”feeling squashed with sensibility”…Going through giving up my life/dream work of saving old things because the practicality of paying for big kids is more important. Having faith that God will provide something else to make my heart soar, that pays more…with less physical effort. Thanks for posting a heart matter.
I had the same dream! My hubby and I shared the dream, so there was no trouble convincing him, but the rest of my family are still dropping hints all the time about how they feel. They are right, our 1893 farmhouse is freezing cold in the winter, the floors are leaning, and the layout is closed off! But we are so head-over-heals in love with this old farmhouse and lil farm! All we see are the original wavy glass windows, heart pine floors, Victorian millwork, cast iron hardware, and farm charm oozing from every corner! We are happy living in our shabby fixer upper dream house together! {most of the time} God cares about your dreams! He created you with a passion for beautiful things and making things beautiful! There is an old dilapidated farmhouse out there, that needs you and your handy hubby to bring it back to its former glory using both of your talents. You will grow closer to each other and to the Lord through your amazing experiences and you won’t regret it! With love and support, from the Floyd family on Bryarton Farm
Dear Marianne,
I truly love your blog and you’re such an inspiration for me. I love the way your write with such depth about everything. And I love your painting and furniture pieces! If I could afford them I definitely would invest in a piece or two. But for now my option is to try to paint things the way you do.
What makes my heart alive is drawing and writing poetry. I’ve loved these since I was saying teenager and have pursued them since. For a few years I put them aside because of pregnancies and children. Now I have resumed drawing and am hoping to start selling my pieces. Wish me luck! And I wish luck to you as well.
Your faithful reader
Fatim
I’m so glad you can both talk and dream together. It’s good that you work together so well. I love the sense of history in old houses and things too. I bring them liberally into my home, but a house that constantly needs something eats my soul. Different strokes. I’m thankful there are people like you to preserve them so I can see them.
Well said…what I think is such a problem for me is that I have been waiting for that “thing”, that “passion” to reveal itself. The gift I have received from hearing your story is that we just need to “do something” and open ourselves to the process. I truly believe that it is in the “doing” that our passions reveal themselves. It’s not going to knock on my front door.
beautiful post…beautifully said…..I was once told that when I get that “stirring” or as I like to call it, “makes my heart skip a beat” feeling when I am around certain old things – that it means that those old things were part of my life once….as in reincarnation. well, I am not one to believe in that….but regardless of our religious or spiritual believes, many of us in modern days experience those feelings. I try not to attempt to rationalize it – but just got with it and enjoy the ride!
I had the privilege of living in a 150 year old house. My husband and I worked on it for five years and did a major reno. Our hearts did feel alive and it had been our dream for years as we moved around with the military. That house was so warm and we felt loved there. It has since gone to a new family that loves it but it was an honor to be allowed to be there for 10 years. Bringing an old home to a new level does make your heart sing and come alive. It is not for everyone,,,,but for those of us that are drawn to them,,,,,,,we feel the pull all the time. I hope you all find your dream when the time comes and bring it to a whole new level.
We live in the historic district in Savannah, Ga. Our house is 150 years old. When we bought it it had been sitting empty for two years and it needed a new roof, so you can imagine the mold, oh, the mold, and all the rest of it that needed to happen just to make it livable. But little by little we get it done. I don’t see it so much as “our” house but that we are taking care of this house for the future. It’s already 150, so we’re not going to let it go down on our watch!
Yes!! I completely understand where you are coming from. There is this sweet little house in my neighborhood built in the 50’s that had been severely neglected. I would drive by it wishing I could buy it and save it, make it alive again. And then someone did just that! They bought it and renovated it beautifully and it makes me so happy to drive by that house seeing it happy and beautiful again. And as far as items go, I like to think of the stories behind them and the people who used them. I’m so happy that Jeff gets it and is on board with your heart. ?
I feel this way about planning events. The details and ideas, the table settings, centerpieces, dishes – whatever is involved make me happy.
My home does too, I get a lot of satisfaction from making my home fit for our family.
I love this post. I have those same feelings about things. I can’t just throw old things out. I have to “save” them. Refinish, repair, paint or at the very least find someone who will appreciate it. Im finding I’m not alone in this. We recently had to clean out my husbands family home. This was a multigenerational farmhouse with 100 years worth of furniture, household goods, family photos, clothing, bedding. You get the picture. A lot has been passed on to family but the “leftovers” were left with the house. We purchased the house and our son and daughter in law will be restoring the home beginning this spring. Finally we are getting down to the end of the ” stuff”. The broken, cracked, rusted, torn, and faded stuff. My husband finally asked me, what are you going to do with all this? I said I’m not keeping it all but I am rescuing it all.
You spoke to me. I am pursuing my “pinch me, I can’t believe this is my life”, life. It isn’t always earth shattering, it isn’t a great money maker, but life is good. And that is enough.
🙂
I really related to this post, Marian. Only in just a different application. I feel this way about Colorado. Being a Native, I just thought it was because I didn’t know any better because I’ve always lived here. But when I’m in the mountains, or even just looking at them from the plains………..I get the sensation that there are roots growing out of me feet into the ground. I feel ‘connected” in every sense of the word to this place……
Marion, I would say that transformation in general gives me a boost in my spirit like nothing other. It can be houses… it can be furniture… most often, it is people. There’s seeing a woman with uncared for hair and clothes that don’t really fit her, transform in body and confidence to a well-put-together woman with the new hairstyle and makeup… I love those kind of things too. Really, what makes my heart jump is just my life in Christ, I have to say. But I think he has put in me the desire to see transformation, because I am one transformed girl!
Beautiful, Lisa.
Yes! Yes! Yes! We have an old home that my husband didn’t appreciate until lately. We’ve spent the last year painting and tweaking and making it ours after living in it for 18 years. It’s part of him now. I think working on a home has to move from “chore” to “labor of love”.
Great post!
I love what you just had to say! I totally get it about saving something old!! So happy your husband understands that now. This will put you in the best direction to your new home as it will be one you both will want to live in!
I think its awesome you love old homes. I love them from afar. What I love is our new home we planned out together (hubby and I) and the hard work and memories we put into building it. We have 5 young children and for me, I crave order right now, and our new house helps with that. I don’t have to battle crooked walls or floors. We lived 10 years in a charming old farmhouse and while I loved the history I do better with old redone furniture and decor to get that feeling. Hope that makes sense!
Great post Marian. I have owned many houses and I liked them all from the new builds to the “used” homes but as I got older I started to appreciate old homes more. 3 years ago I bought a home built in the 40’s that had been really neglected for at least 10 years and I had friends look at me like I needed my head examined. I truly felt like I was rescuing this house. I am loving the changes that are taking place. And I have a huge book collection that relatives are always telling me I need to get rid of them and stop dragging them from house to house. Well I LOVE those books. They are friends of mine and I feel at peace when I sent in the room with them. May be weird for some but it’s my reality.
Oh and living a Plan B life. Yes, my jobs have been a Plan B life because of the salary. But now that I’m older that is going to stop.
I, too, have always wanted to live in an older home. I would have been satisfied with a bungalow from the 30’s or 40’s. But, with my husband’s career, we were corporate gypsies for most of our working lives. DH, in particular, thought selling an old home would be too hard and we had to be practical. And so we were. I lived through that and it’s ok. In 2003, we moved to a very plain jane, dated ranch home. Why? Because the land makes our hearts sing. He retired at 53 in 2007 and he’s now 61 and I am partially retired now, at 59. We hope to someday dress up our little ranch at least be a little bit, but time is running out. You can’t stay young forever and we may never be able to make this house what we thought it could be. But, living on this 3 acres overlooking a valley in area often compared to Bavaria (with smaller mountains) has made us so happy these past 16 years. It’s strange that it turned out, the land pulled me more than any house ever could. I wouldn’t have expected that. I feel very blessed. God had another plan and I am so glad he showed us what it was.
I am so glad that Jeff gets it! I certainly do. I live in a town that is known for antiques and nineteen-O-something homes. Even the name of my church reflects the town spirit; Restoration Road. The stairs have to creak and the ceiling has to have weird angles. I fall in love and want to restore these gems that have sheltered many families over the years.
I loved the post! I feel a new/old home in your near future.
What a great post. I love all home design applications, but I have to say…my heart beats more quickly when I first walk into a big home decor fabric store. My eyes widen and all I see are possibilities. That’s why I started a weekly textile post…just to get my textile fix and share my love for it with others.
The funny thing is this post made a light bulb go on with me. My husband wants to travel to Missouri in May because it will be the last time comic book icon Stan Lee will be autographing. He has always wanted his autograph because he has had a love of comic books since he was a kid. I totally didn’t “get it”…until just now.
Thanks for the a-ha moment.
Same way here! I get such a thrill out of vintage pieces and pieces with stories. Our home is one of the Gold Medallion Electric Homes that were built just across from Johhson Space Center- known as the Galaxy of Homes. It’s such a unique little area and we love that our “tiny Tudor” has such a cool history. Bringing it back to life and rescuing it is one of the most rewarding things my husband and I did.
Loved this post so much. I also appreciated every comment made. I have found that the readers of this blog (new to me) seem so full of kindness and insights. But then, the author is and will draw such people. 🙂 My husband and I are too old now to start over in a fixer-upper (really, we have done that all our lives because that was all we could afford in the two small houses we have owned …. but how I would’ve loved a truly old house … stone … stucco!) But I am grateful for the many blessings we have had in so many ways. My heart does come alive as I find something old and make it work in our home … when I can take a 1960’s split level and give it a farm/shaker feeling in spite of the architecture. Sometimes I think I love old things because they speak of a day gone by when things were simpler and more innocent. You who restore things so wonderfully (I have not ventured too far in that area) must have hearts that see the good in worn people, too. I enjoy following this blog in every way, including its readers, even though I am not much of a contributor at this time in life. Perhaps as I learn more about refinishing I will be … I am retiring soon! :o)
It’s in retirement, Dianne, that some of us retirees are finally able to do the things that make our heart sing! I’m 68 and this year hope to begin a blog and rescue items that need a new life, add some love into their lives and make them sing again and then sell them to those who are hear that music. Be encouraged!
Living in Germany for a few years when my kids were small gave me such an appreciation for
buildings that are old. Maybe that’s where yours comes from too? : )
I get it, completely! And my husband is so practical, too. I have a feeling you’ll be living in an older home within a couple of years;-)
Best to you,
Dionne
I find it difficult, often, to explain the feeling, but you nailed it in this post. I love old things — not just because of their appearance, but because of the people before me who have used, loved, touched, and treasured the items. One of my prized possessions is a Victorian-era pump organ. It was made for a lovely bride by her skilled husband as a wedding present for her. On the organ, I have pictures of her as a bride and as a 90-year-old. She played that organ every day of her long life. I feel like I touch her hands when I touch its keys, and feel a little of the joy she felt at the gift from her bridegroom. No reproduction can thrill me in that way, no matter how skillfully it is designed or “aged” to look old.
I get it as well. In high school, I found an old stool in a relative’s basement. I wanted to refinish it and recover the seat. My family thought I was crazy. When I told my guidance counselor that I wanted to be an interior decorator, she laughed. Who would pay you to do that? Be a nurse, they said. You will always have a job. So I was a nurse for 43 yrs. I was a nurse who hated touching people; I was a nurse who detested every minute of it, longing for the smoothness of wood, the texture of fabric and the colors of paint. Although I was good at my job, there was no passion. Others got such satisfaction from the job that I often became jealous. The moral of this story is “follow your passion” and listen to what your heart says. Don’t be swayed.
This speaks to me so much. Sometimes it’s hard to articulate why something matters so much, especially when there isn’t a logical explanation. My husband finally came to understand and now he calls it making me “heart happy”. He no longer needs to understand exactly why I want to buy some old piece of furniture or hang pictures *right there* or paint something a very particular shade. All he needs to know is that it will make me heart happy, and that’s enough. I can’t wait to see what you can do to bring an old, neglected ugly duckling back to life. Good luck and thx for sharing!
Obviously this post has touch a lot of souls, mine included. My hubs is a really easy going guy who lacks passion about anything. And that’s OK. I on the other hand feel a great deal of passion about my home, crafting and history. Now that the kids are grown I’m giving myself permission to explore these things again. Just last night the hubs was smirking. I was going about my buz decorating a little for Spring/Easter and he didn’t get why I wanted to put all that work into it. My simple answer was that it makes me happy. I also pursued the history part and traced my family tree which for me filled in pretty much all of the gaps as to my I am the way I am and why I love the things I love. I traveled to France 40 years ago as a young girl and it pulled my heart strings so hard. Now I know why as my roots lead back there. I am a strong woman because there were many that went before me – and in your neck of the woods! Finally realizing that doing what your heart tells you is the actual art of living! Thanks so much for this post and validating what we all feel.
Both of the houses I’ve lived in as an adult have been over 100 years old. I love them and all of their quirkiness. My husband likes the old too although he’s a little tired of painting and ripping off wallpaper and stuff but I don’t think he’d trade it for anything new. I’m glad your husband gets it. It’s a big, never ending project but very worthwhile I think.
Yeah i know what you mean, i always wanted an old house with a wonderful old wooden staircase, but that is not what i got,but it is paid for and i am retired. I decided maybe God knew better than i did and i have the money to travel and that is a plus. Hope you find your home you have dreamed of.
Our home was “modernised”” in 1790 – so really no idea how old some of it is. My husband has lived here for 69 years and I for over 40 years. It is far too big for us – 20 plus rooms and 3ft thick stone walls. I don’t think either of us are ready to leave yet – we just love it so much! We know we are only caretakers for now, but as long as we can keep caring for it we will!
And isn’t that what Jesus does for us? Makes us alive again. Brings back to glory a faded tattered shell. Just a thought, why maybe bringing the old, with its character and inate value, back with a new life- the best of both! Have a blessed Easter!
Oh yes, Marian! I can fully understand this! I’d always intended writing children’s books, and, so, years ago, I decided to do a correspondence course. Initially they sent out a ‘get to know you’ type of survey. In the survey they asked, ‘What do you really love to do?’ I’d never actually thought about it before. I guess the answer was ‘write stories’?? My answer was, ‘I like taking something old and unused and unloved and bringing it back to life and beauty and functionality’. Ha ha! A very defining moment! Like you, this is something which gives me so much joy, and makes my heart positively sing! It fills me up! I BELONG to it more than anything else.
My parents lived in one of the oldest houses in our area, and we were all brought up in it. I assumed, one day I’d own it and renovate it. When I was 16 I drew up the plans of the way I’d do this. However, my husband wanted a new home to be built on the block, instead, and refused to move otherwise. (I really didn’t like the house we lived in). I felt I had no option but to take my chances and build a new home with an old ‘feel’. Big mistake! We’ve been in the house for 6 years now and I am STILL trying to create the old home I wanted. Will I ever get there? I know I’ll keep trying! It’s blogs like yours which are helping ENORMOUSLY with ideas and hints, so thank you!
I’m so glad Jeff is seeing the light!
Have a lovely Thursday!
Liz (Australia)
Great post!! =)
Awesome…so well put!
I bet you love Rehab Addict on HGTV!!!
Perfectly said! Can totally relate. xx
So where did you go to dinner???
When I run my hand along the 100+ year old bannister in my home, I wonder about those who had done the same throughout the years. Old homes have soul and new homes, though complete with all the bright and shiny, can’t capture that same essence. Thanks for the post….a great conversation to have with a spouse…
I think a lot of us out here feel the same way. It’s what draws us together on your blog, and it’s what keeps us coming back for more. You of course are it too, but I think the real draw is our love of old things and what can be done with them to breathe new life into them. I know it’s why I’m here. You have a unique way of reusing and sprucing up old things and I love it! I also absolutely love old things. Our home is a 250+ yr old log cabin that was saved by my husbands family. While it’s not m personal taste, I’m more of a farmhouse white type of person, I do truly love that I live in a piece of history that might have otherwise been lost. I could go on about this all day. It’s why I have an antique business, not for the money, but for the love!
Perfect ending!
You took the words right out of my mouth! What I have been trying so hard to explain to my fiancé about wanting a century home was summed up perfectly in your post. I just read it to him and he gets it now. Thank you!
Thank you for digressing a bit to express yourself so honestly. That’s what I like about your blog – you’re transparent. You’re real.
You are 30+ years younger but I can relate so much to what makes your heart feel alive. November 2014 I moved into the very first home I’ve ever lived in as an adult and it’s 100% mine. I’m very blessed by God. It’s a 1950’s (842 sqft) bungalow that was lightly renovated for a coastal look and was pretty much turnkey ready. The best house at the best price was my prayer and that’s what God provided. I LOVE my home! It doesn’t have state of the art appliances, hardware, etc. But it is cozy, clean, wonderful floor plan, 6000 sqft lot and the cutest home on the block…or the neighborhood for that matter! I live on the end of the cul-de-sac and I’ve noticed passengers driving by slowly as they look at my property. (Hopefully they’re not casing the place.) I’ve seen and been in million dollar new construction homes in the same county and driven home to my little bungalow and smiled as I drove into the driveway and saw my little home smiling back at me!
Though the home didn’t come with original hardwood floors, they did leave the kitchen with it’s original 50’s sink and counter top, as well as leaving the bathroom with it’s original cast iron tub. I plan on having it resealed but my plumber advises “they don’t make them like that anymore” and suggests if there aren’t any water leaks to leave well enough alone. The bathroom floors and tub tile work are original. Not my favorite color (white square tiles on bath surround with trim in brown and cobalt blue tiles; floor in shiny brown tile) but they are in great condition!
Just two weeks ago the granddaughter of the original owner drove by and asked to look at the home. I was delighted to welcome her in and heard her reminisce. What a joy to hear the story of my little home. That’s why it smiles at me whenever I return home. There’s been heartwarming family memories made in this home and there’s a score of hand prints (and a few paw prints as well) in the patio cement for posterity!
Your words are inspiring. What makes my heart smile is this home and the adventures and warm memories that my life, at 68, will add to it’s history. I’m committed to keeping that smile on it’s face for future owners and for the community as well.
Alicia, you made me cry – it is so wonderful for you to be so proud and content with your house and to feel it smiling back at you!
Beautiful post. I feel the same way when it comes to old things – that pang in my heart and wondering about the lives that touched this home, or this piece of furniture. . .
Your words are inspiring, keep up the great work!
I think sometimes we get going so fast we forget to even ask ourselves if we are enjoying our lives. Yesterday, I had a three hour meeting with my family about what our ideal life would be. Everything from how do you want to feel when you wake up to what do you want your history lessons to be like.
We all really wanted to actually enjoy being alive. To enjoy how our food tastes and to wake up rested. I noticed that I had no trouble getting the kids to bed last night, they were so looking forward to resting well.
I am learning to slow down and pay attention to my levels of peace throughout the day. I hope to grow more and more in this.
Girl, yes! The more you slow down…the more you hear that calling. For those of us working full time jobs on top of our other full time job of parenting- we need this more than anyone else!!! Slow down, listen. YOU are still there.
I grew up in Texas in a Queen Ann home built in the 1800’s, completely furnished in antiques.. Then I married a Navy officer and moved moved moved.. Retirement and one last move..to a Queen Ann home built in 1892. . upon seeing pictures of my “last Voyage” home my hometown friends all wrote me and said:You have bought your home on Pine street (My childhood home) I did not even realize that I had indeed done that. So Old homes were in my soul and appeared the first chance I got. I understand exactly what you are expressing.. I am 89 years old (Old house /old owner) but my home still makes me happy. Jeff will have to be ready to fix”things” frequently. And Marian you will have to be willing to do without to help with the repairs. But it will be well worth these small sacrirfices to be happy with and in your dream home. Jere
PS.Old houses were built to last ..mine is still standing after 124 years, so go for it.
❤️ Speaking from your soul?. Dosen’t get much better than that. And my soul totally understands. I feel the same way when I feel, see, sense, into a space and can envision a clear transformation. You Rock It Marion?.
Your post is so heart-warming – I am so glad you and your husband are on the same wavelength now. I am a bit wistful, as I feel I am floundering. I have been very successful in my career; I have a wonderful job, great colleagues. And yet … and yet. I need to find what makes my heart sing. Thanks for the inspiration.
Thank you for the thought-inspiring post, Marian. I enjoyed letting my mind wander to what makes my heart feel alive. I agree with you whole heartedly! Life is too short to be “stuck” in a life that is unfulfilling. We may not be able to change everything, but we can start by changing one thing and go from there. I am sure you have inspired many to think about ways to bring more joy into their lives. Thanks!
Thank you for giving words to what my heart feels. I’m constantly feeling the tug between what makes my heart feel alive and what makes sense financially. Many days (even today) I feel like just abandoning my dream and settling for a sensible life. Then that still small voice whispers to my heart. Thank you for sharing your insight. You always inspire me.
I have been reading your blog for years but this is the first time I’ve left a comment. I am similarly affected by what is old and has a history of thoughtful design and craftsmanship that doesn’t exist (for me anyway) in the bulk of mass-produced fodder for obscene consumption that is so ubiquitous in the marketplace today. Well pardon me as I tumble off my soap box and offer this point of view. I have a deeper soul connection with something that has been wrought out of an ethic of proud craftsmanship and then has been appreciated and cared for by others before me. I declare that I am an empath that can feel the pleasure that others took from the use and admiration of an object. My sister is an empath and can feel people (here and gone) but I feel through pieces and places! Perhaps that we are kindred spirits in this way is why I have been following your blog and shouting “Hooray for you!” all this time. I just wanted to say… I get you, Soul Sister!
BTW: I love! Love!! LOVE!!! The tufted sofa! I have an old sofa that needs reupholstering, it doesn’t have a tufted back, but it could 😉 it does, however have arms that reach forward and then cup around to hold a bolster in place on the ends of the sofa. I bought it at auction and was informed that it had originally come from a very old, historic grand hotel that was the jewel of Spokane, Washington. Your completed sofa is a great inspiration to me.
It’s all about sustainability and being kind to the earth! Well spoken…
Yep, it’s about soul. Old homes, furniture, even random bits of architectural salvage are living things to me. I’d so much rather have old, uneven, dinged-up wood floors than the shiny, new engineered wood ones. I’ll choose the old basket with the handle smooth as silk from use over the new Longaberger one every time. My heart flutters over these things like it used to over youthful crushes! In fact, even reading about your shopping trips and seeing your finds gives me that gushy feeling. Finding your blog was like finding an old friend I’d never met. I look forward to reading it everyday. Thank you, Marian!
I love living in an old home. My husband and I have been in an old farmhouse on several acres in the country for a few years now. It is a slow process to fix it up and get rid of some of the less than appealing renovation pieces from the past, but it is so exciting when you pull the drywall off to find original tongue and groove walls and ceilings or hardwood floors. There are still many things to do, and living in an old house means the work is never done and there are many things to deal with that you wouldn’t have to consider in a new home, but it is worth it. You should not give up on your dream. No one should. Without dreams, life wouldn’t be nearly as fun.
He gets you!!! That’s my takeaway from this post. Jeff finally gets you! Hurray!
Always stay true to your heart I say. My husband and I have fixed up 6 houses, 4 old ones, and 2 new ones, I will take a 100year old plus house over new any day. We have redone a Victorian, 2 Farmhouses, and for the past 11/2 years a Victorian cottage remuddled in the late 60’s, worst of the old houses we have ever worked on. It is a lot of work and money, to take out the 70’s, and make it look like it would have in 1870. It is finally starting to come together, but so much of the original had been removed, it creates a lot more work. Worth it if you can survive the process!
I love this post and I fully subscribe to your philosophy too! Exploring anything old or treasure hunting is what I would pick to do on any given day if I had every option in the world. My mom passed it down to me and now, as a mom, my 6-year-old son has the bug too! Thank you for such an honest and beautiful post!
I always tell people that I don’t save puppies and kittens, but I DO save old furniture, homes and junk. Things other people would discard give me the most joy to restore. Just today, I took a bunch of old metal floor lamps, door knobs, bike wheels and other various metal objects to a welder friend to make useful objects out of. I can’t wait to see them all finished! I hope I’m not the only one who “gets it” and that they sell in my shop!
I had the wonderful pleasure of living in Newtown, Ct for 13 years. Living in Ct was such a different experience from living in NJ, where I was born and raised. There is such a sense of history and the past that even the inattentive observer can see and that is because of the large % of antique homes. Newtown has a town historian and one of the things he has done is catalog all of the antique homes. The last time I looked, over there were over 750 antique home built before 1900, 150+ before 1800, all still occupied. I’ve been in a few and I understand what you mean, the character is not something you can repeat. My biggest issue with these houses is how incredibly uncomfortable they can be in the winter, even with a modern heating system. I have a friend who built a replica late 1700’s home-wide pine floors, center hall staircase and a New England keeping room with a huge fireplace and hand hewn ceiling beams. Absolutely gorgeous and none of the winter breezes in the living room. So it can be done, Marian, the old and the new.
I live in a house built in 1913. I can’t see any drawback to owning an older home if you have basic handyman knowledge. My old house seems to have far less upkeep than my friends that live in generic ramblers built in the 60s. It’s more like the old saying “they don’t make them like they used to”. Most people don’t even realize it’s an old home at all because the floors have been refinished, until they go to open a window and they see it runs on pulleys.
Wow, Marian. Just Wow. I am at that crossroads thinking about the life I have led up to now. Rocky… to say the least. And, while just gathering the courage, starting to pursue my dreams of living a purposeful, creative, passionate life, (which coincidentally began with painting murals – then progressed to furniture – now I have 2 booths and i have ideas of wanting to make this all into more), I have a family member wanting to talk to me about the sensible job I need to get instead. And I hear “I have no confidence in you, your talents, your business sense, and I think you better leave all those ideas to those who can, and who have husbands to support them and help them.” And I think, they are right. I shouldn’t do this, I am a woman alone. How will I take care of my kids, my housework, my business, my facebook page (started it in Oct haven’t posted anything yet), my blog (I didn’t make it yet), other social media… in order to get the word out there that I can help others – I feel a greater purpose when I am helping others, exploring their talents, creating beauty, bringing back the forgotten and cast aside things…living with old things, appreciating their chippy, crazed, and worn selves and reviving them. I hear the sensible ones and the naysayers in my head…discouraging me from these endeavors. “Get an admin assistant job, 9 to 5 with benefits. Do that other stuff on the side.” And then there is you. You have had a way of speaking to me, time and again, just when I need to hear words of understanding and encouragement to stand up and do what makes my heart sing! This will bring goodness to many and to my family. God gave you talent and a voice and I needed to see it and hear it today to be strong in my new understanding of my purpose. Thank you! …On a second note, my now-passed Father said to me at the end of my failing marriage to a man looking for greener pastures.. “Honey, he never “got” you…he didn’t try to see what made you so special.” In all the trauma and drama of infidelity and divorce, my Dad boiled down to the core – I hadn’t understood that until he spoke those words. I think, as I read your post, how blessed you and your Jeff are. “Getting” someone doesn’t happen in all marriages, it takes work, patience, open-mindedness, open-heartedness and love on both sides – to explain and to understand. Congratulations to you both! I am so happy to hear your love story and I thank you for your candidness and letting us in. Through this sharing there is LOVE.
As I have read your comment today, Lisa, I am sure that you will make the impact on the world that you feel the echos of in your heart (pshhh to the naysayers)! You have so eloquently shared here and have moved me with your passion and stirred in me affinity with your well expressed thoughts. So go on, be glorious and share what makes your heart sing, you obviously have a beautiful voice for it. And your kids….well, how special for them to have a mother who models this commitment to her true self. Won’t they benefit along the way by what you’ll teach them about the practicalities of stuff, creative careers and business. And doesn’t it thrill you to think that you can instill in them the glory and awe of being your own unique genius!! And even when they are teenagers, rolling their eyes in the back of their heads because you’ve braked for one more garage sale, or bought your umpteenth furniture piece, they will get that you are a stand for “living a purposeful, creative, passionate life”. So go forth and let this be the springboard for your blog, your FaceBook page. You obviously have something worthwhile to share.
You are a great writer and blogger! It was a good read for me, I have your book and I really understand your choices. Glad you can express your desires so well.
Would love to have an older home but I love all the conveniences in our home! I have lived in a tiny house, a new modern house with a loft, a 1936 historical home and my big house that looks like a cottage, all have provided good memories! From reading your blog I have changed how I buy things. I do not run out and buy shiny new decor…I look for items with history or something I can paint over or re-use.
We have had the very same discussions here at my house. The difference is that I DO live in an 1850 house. My husband talks often about “building new to look like old”…
The history, the past, of my house keeps me company. I truly feel like I exist here along with all of the others that have left their trace – when I walk into a new construction home I feel…lonely.
I’ll tell you this though – even a very well kept 1850 house has an endless list of things to be done with/to it. You DON’T need to rescue it from a bad 70’s renovation to keep busy! Our house didn’t even have running water and electricity until the 1960’s. It escaped MUCH of what could have (potentially) been done to it.
It’s still a constant labor (of love).
-b.
love everything about this post. we are kindred spirits! the thought of passing up an “old thing” to purchase something new hurts my heart. i’d rather save the old and be part of it’s story. in with the old!!!
Hi, I have been fortunate to live all my life in ancient houses full of history and life.
I grew up in a farm labourers house built in 1912, went to a school built in 1865.
Since then I’ve lived in houses ranging in age from a 1600’s “Hall” to the 1960’s hateful bungalow I live in now.
It is completely devoid of feeling and character.
I will love it and hug it and call it George until it is a psudo-1920’s feeling/looking bungalow.
I’ve been carting about a green and cream tiled art deco fireplace (its concrete around a cast iron frame and takes 6 to lift it), all my adult life.
I now, finally have a forever home and will install it and give it life, here around which, the entire house will be redesigned.
However, nothing beats a home of great age, full of layers, to be pealed off and revealed.
After reading this post I’m reminded of two quotes from Rumi: “When you do things from your soul, you feel a river moving in you, a joy.” And “Let yourself be silently drawn by the strange pull of what you really love, it will not lead you astray.” I find great meaning in these 800 year old quotes, perhaps you do too.
And I also totally understand your feelings about all things old, especially houses. We are currently fixing up our 100+ year old New England home and I while buying something newer would have been so much easier, I just couldn’t. Next up is adding operable shutters (ones nailed to the house just wouldn’t do!) on all the windows. I scored ones the perfect size on craigslist and at $75 for the lot, is an incredible find! Our current home search was certainly a journey, when you decide to undertake yours, I look forward to hearing all about it!
I completely get it!!! Every time I drive past an old house that has been abondoned and sometimes boarded up I want to pull over and walk though it. I think about the family and the happy times shared within the walls. I love the old details and dream of some day restoring one myself.
Here’s to the dreams deep within our hearts!
God Bless,
Frances
For me, it is flowers. I love them. I’m making an effort to plant more flowers this year: perennials, bulbs, and seeds. They make me feel incredibly happy.
Cousin Stephany and fiancé bought an old church in Akron for next to nothing and plan to renovate for their home. Consider other types of buildings if they come along. How fun that you enjoy your “job”. I finally love my current “job”, being retired!!!
PS I put the word job in quotes because when you love it, it really is not a job. You go gal!!
Hello fellow Empath up there! Have you ever been in an antique store and a piece of furnture gave off evil vibes? I couldn’t get out of there fast enough. So we can “read” things, and people. Not their minds, their intent, their character. I also recognize that we have lived many many lifetimes on earth, and I do believe that Marion last lived in the period that she loves. Her soul, which stays the same, recognizes the things she liked, used, and loved. I know this theory may be far out to some of you, but there are enough people given various gifts to know it exists. Read Edgar Cayce, read Bridey Murphy. Wonder no more, sweet gifted lady, we appreciate your love for old things, and join you ourselves, b/c we know why.
That is so interesting Marian. I have been so burdened by life that I honestly don’t know what makes my heart feel alive. Need to ponder this.
You are a blessed woman – to have a husband that desires to ‘hear your heart’. Don’t forget to tell him, unless you already have:)
The thought of leaving my old home makes me sad, sick and scared!! The thought of living in a new home makes me want to run and hide. I dreamed for years of an older home. I spent hours looking at real estate ads, riding in neighborhoods with older homes. It was my dream, mine alone. One day my dream came true, my husband came along for the ride and because we are partners and my dream was his. That was 16 years ago. We have spent many dollars and hours, as well as tears and joy. In the last few weeks we have been discussing “down sizing” this house is much to large for us to keep up, but we can’t imagine anything else. Even when I look for smaller it is always old with work that needs to be done. Once you have ” that feeling” in your heart, you can’t change it.
I SO understand your feelings about old, used, things with history that show their age or need restoring. You could have been talking about me and what makes my heart sing. I am nearly 72 years old and only once in my life when I was between nine and fourteen years old did I live in an old house. It was an old Victorian with pocket doors and porches and a parlor. It is my favorite of all the places I have lived and I have such a longing to live in another old house that needs love and restoration. At my age with my economic resources that will probably never happen and I will remain in this “dumb 1960’s ranch”. But I still dream and look at old houses and pine for one and know exactly how it feels to experience the excitement of contemplating owning or restoring one. And I feel that, too, about things other than houses–old objects and furniture, art, textiles, etc., etc., etc., Thoughts of those things are present in my mind and heart every day, all the time. I hope you do get to buy and restore/decorate an older home and I hope you write about doing that so I can live it vicariously. Thanks for sharing your thoughts on this heartfelt subject.
I loved this post… “What makes your heart feel alive” will be the topic of my next journal page …because if there is one thing in life that makes my heart feel alive it is making another list!
Seriously, I think the people who follow their hearts and choose professions and/or hobbies which satisfy an interest or a passion are the happiest… To me, it’s really a matter of taking the time to identify a talent or a gift uniquely yours meant to be enjoyed and shared with others….
“The meaning of life is to find your gift. The purpose of life is to give it away.”
The cottage I live in is exactly what makes my heart skip. We bought it as a weekend place back in 1997 after looking for 3 years. I almost didn’t get out of the car because it was built in 1906 but had undergone a hideous 1970″s redo. The interior wasn’t grabbing me either but it was on an incredible waterfront lot on Puget Sound. 3 years ago we moved in full time. Through almost 19 years of restoration I am so very happy with our decision to call this our home.
Perfectly said and felt
Your words are so beautiful and yes we should all take time to just be. Look around at our life and the direction it’s going. Are we doing work that truly makes you happy? Are we doing what we feel called to do. Are we using our God given talents for good? If not we have the power to make changes. You are such an inspiration to so many! Thank you.
My thoughts are those exactly. I wake up excited every day to sand furniture. Weird but true. Thank you for putting my thoughts into words.
Oh Marion, you do stir ones soul with your writing and all you do. I too am moved by my surroundings, and know I am Blessed. What stirs me for my own surroundings may be somewhat different in some ways but I have a deep appreciation for beauty and inspiration. Whether I’m witnessing it while others are inspired and creating, or I am inspiring others, or being inspired myself to create. i yearn to find the platform to expand an share inspiration and creativity as you have. Your platform is so encompassing, artfully carried out through your speaking, writing and creating and sharing. Thank you for all you share❤️??.
Dear Marion,
What makes my heart feel alive is following people like you. I desire to create a space for myself and my family that is comforting and beautiful.
I was blessed to come home to California almost two years ago now.
My daughters and I left a community that we loved to care for my Dad.
He only lived for two more months after we got here.
It was an honor to help him move through his dying time.
Now, my fifteen year old are here on 5 acres of my Grandparents original 1929 Homestead. I want to dream big and live large here. This land has always been my safe place. Now I must learn to create a home and to create a b&b business and art studio out of my heart and into reality. The Desert calls so many people to Her.
I want to create a way to live here and to share it with others who are passing through. I have many ideas but I need focus and a plan to share my family Homestead here in Joshua Tree. It isn’t old. But the Nordic drive my ancestors came here with lingers on on my heart. The old and the new come from an ancient love.
Thank you for inspiring me.
Sincerely,
Cheryl Davis-Blankenship
All of you speak to my soul and my heart’s desires. Since I was a child (I just turned 59) I was in love with the Victorian homes on the older side of the tracks from our 1957 split level home in the suburbs of Chicago. The turrets, gingerbread, porches, stained glass, etc., enchanted me. When my grandmother passed away when I was 13, I inherited much of her things that no one else in the family wanted – beautiful victorian chairs and tables, and my pride and joy, my Maxfield Parrish print of “Daybreak” that started a life long passion of collecting his gorgeous prints. Seriously, what 13 year old girl redecorates her bedroom like that?! My friends and family always thought I was a little nuts…
I dragged my things to college and all over the place as my life took me to live in IL, RI, CA, MT, the Caribbean, CO, and then back to IL, to finally get a “sensible” job and be near my family. No matter where I was living I always dreamed of living in the country in an old farm house. I went on, on, ad nauseum, every time I saw a house that I wished I could live in… And I kept collecting antiques and farmhouse furnishings for my hopefully dream house I could one day live in.
Fast forward a year ago… I lost my job in the suburbs in a wave of layoffs in the truck/automotive industry. Where was I going to get another job at my age making what I needed to make in the land of high taxes and few jobs? I spent a few months trying to decide what to do. I’ve never been married and have no kids so I was really lost. I started taking road trips to the rural areas in IL and discovered the hills in NW IL. And I knew that there was where I was meant to be.
I started looking at real estate online and after several trips, 2000 miles and about 100 drive-bys, I found my dreams house. A 1922, 5 bedroom farmhouse, with a 2 sided wrap around porch, on the side of a hill, on 2.2 acres. There are woods on one side and cows on the other. My house looks across a valley to beautiful rolling hills filled with crops, cows and horses.
The house is filled with all original woodwork (thankfully never painted), tall ceilings and not to many horrible renovations. I cashed out my retirement account and began the remodelling. It is almost ready to move into. The locals think I’m a little crazy but I’m used to that.
Yes, I know that it is a crazy thing that I did but I have never worked harder and have never been happier.
I have a lot to learn – small town farm life, well water and septic tanks, and endless plumbing and electrical challenges, to name a few. To the lady who wrote about her clawfoot tub, I just had mine reglazed and it is gorgeous! The plumber is in the process of installing the period looking tub/shower plumbing and I hope to take my first bath next week.
Whew, sorry I got so long winded but all of you kindred spirits inspired me to confess my crazy dreams.
I’m running out of money, I’ll need to make an income, and I’ll be all alone for the most part, but I believe in my heart that it will some how work out. That’s the thing about dreams… you just have to take a chance.
About 3 months ago I discovered Miss Mustardseed and have been reading through everything. She is so inspirational and I have enjoyed all her posts and ideas. Can’t wait to move in and start trying out her ideas, methods and decorating styles.
Thank you all for your creativity and inspiration.
Keep dreaming,
Linda
Speaking to my heart with this post! My husband and I are newly installed (4 months) at our furniture booth, and we (mainly me) are dealing with the overwhelming thoughts of staying the same, or expanding and going with our hearts….I struggle with expressing to him how re-loving furniture and decor is a creative outlet for me, and that furniture “speaks” to me….like it says “make me look this way” or “make this wonderful part of me stand out” ….I will be showing this beautiful post to him tonight, and I thank you from the bottom of my heart for putting the words together for me 🙂